Play-full

I always tell my kids, “Be a child as long as you can…you have to be an adult the rest of your life.”


Now, I say that to them when they are enjoying games in the yard with the neighbors or swinging on their well-loved swing set or going on adventures in the forest…and they know what I mean. I DO NOT encourage them to be childish in their responsibilities, respect, or emotions. In those areas, I expect them to be mature at a young age—to be self-governing and self-controlled. But when it comes to play—bring it on!


Play is the work of childhood. If our children are too busy with organized activities and we don’t allow them enough time to freely play, we will stunt certain areas of their development. It is in this “work” that our children will feel most satisfied. It is in this “work” that our children will bring the most glory to God. Children bring glory to their Creator when they play because of this: We are all created to do SOMETHING; and when we do that SOMETHING that God created us to do, that SOMETHING brings great glory to God. Bumblebees are created to gather pollen and make honey—by doing this—this SOMETHING that God designed them specifically to do—they bring glory to the One Who made them. Flowers are created to bloom and provide beauty; when they show off their brilliance in the spring and summer, they are doing the SOMETHING that God created them to do, and they are glorifying the Flower-Creator. Children are designed to play…and play…and play. It is when children are playing and experiencing the world and marveling at nature that they are most like God—because they are doing the SOMETHING that he created specifically for them.

When we bring glory to our Lord, that is when we are most like Him, because He is ever glorious.


Don’t allow your children to grow up too fast. They desperately need the experiences of childhood. Childhood may be the only time in their lives when they know EXACTLY what they are supposed to be doing. NEVER tell your daughter, “You are too old for that", or belittle your son for enjoying childish routines. God designed children to need to play and to laugh and to love and to believe they are safe. These are a child’s most basic needs. When they are met, a child can be a child. And in doing this, they can bring glory to their Heavenly Father.

Jesus loves the little children,
All the children of the world.
Red and yellow, black and white,
All are precious in His sight,
Jesus loves the little children of the world.

Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

Matthew 19:14

Things I Say to my Kids

My children think I’m weird because I say the same things over and over. But I don’t think I’m weird because these things make sense. See what you think:
“Be a kid as long as you can. You have to be an adult the rest of your life.” Basically, kids need to take full advantage of childhood, when summers are long and desserts are guilt-free. I recently waxed eloquent on this one. You can read it here.


“Everything in moderation.” This is probably something I say daily. I find real value in balance—whether it be in eating or exercising, socializing or spending. It is my firm belief that anything of this world, taken to the extreme, is unhealthy for mind and body. If I practice moderation in my daily routine, I can enjoy my work, my play, and my chocolate.


“Only touch it once.” This phrase has probably saved me hours of work. Rather than bringing the mail in, separating it into good mail/junk mail, just throw the junk mail immediately, and save yourself a pile—and a touch. Or instead of putting something in a basket on the stairway to help you remember to take it downstairs, just run, quick as a bunny, and take it downstairs immediately. Get it? Only touch it once.


“Little messes make big messes.” or the inverse, “If you clean up little messes, you won’t have big messes.” When my children were younger and would pour 1,200 Legos on the floor all at once, I would cringe, and then in a fake, sweet–as–I-could-muster voice say, “When you get done playing, I want you to clean up that little mess before you get out more toys because, remember? Little messes make big messes. Or, in present day, when I bravely venture in Tess’s closet and am alarmed at the mountain of clothes as tall as myself, I cringe, and I say in a fake, sweet-as-I-can-muster voice, “If you clean up little messes, you won’t have big messes”, while trying to stress the importance of doing laundry at regular intervals, especially since college is on the very near horizon and roommates probably don’t want to share a room with a dirty-laundry hoarder.


“Make a place for it and you won’t lose it.” This just seems to make sense—although maybe not to my children, as seen here. If you establish a place for something (and put it there every day after school, or every night before you go to bed)--like a wallet or phone or keys or your favorite stuffed chipmunk, Chippy—then YOU WILL ALWAYS KNOW WHERE TO LOOK FOR THAT ITEM and you won’t run around the house like a crazy person looking for it frantically before you leave. Enough said. And by the way, it really really bugs me when people spell lose, loose. When you lose a tooth, it falls from your mouth, but when your tooth is loose, it is merely wiggly, but still attached. Sorry, just had to get that off my chest.


“Nobody Cares.” This may sound calloused, but in reality, it is true. When you are 15 and concerned that you didn’t get that chunk of hair in the back of you head curled exactly right, you must remember, “Nobody cares.” When your connection group is coming over to your house and you forgot to shine up the faucets in the half bath and the kid’s backpacks are still laying all over the counter, you must remember, “Nobody cares.” When your brother looks weird because he got up exactly 2 minutes before the gang left for church, and his shirt is a little small, you must remember, “Nobody cares.” And if you have to wear a cardigan because it’s chilly and the sweater has a V-neck, but you’re wearing it over a crew neck shirt, it’s not the end of the world, because you must remember, “Nobody cares.”

Well, that’s all the weirdness I can muster up today. Stay tuned and maybe I will remember more valuable “Things I say to my kids.”

10 Frogs

frog on a lily pad…by Josh

My young friend Joshua has gone through some tough stuff in his eleven short years…and he hasn’t had much time to be a little boy…until lately. Lately, Josh has been swinging, and running, and exploring in the forest—all things every boy is supposed to do. And just last week, Josh caught some frogs—little tiny frogs—just past their tadpole stage—and he put them in a bucket. These frogs have given Joshua great amounts of joy.

Now frogs aren’t really my thing, and I wasn’t really sure why they were such a cause of rejoicing for him, but knowing that this now-little boy was thrilled with them, I tried to listen as he has talked incessantly about his new “pets”.

But then, last Wednesday night, I figured it out. As I attended our church’s family program with my little friend (his mom had to work), I found out why these frogs were so precious to him. As we were instructed by the pastor, we prayed as families (and since I was the “parent sub” for the night, Josh and I held hands and prayed). First, Pastor Shane asked us to appreciate God for Who He was; I did this, but Josh declined. Then he asked us to pray for someone else; I did this, but Josh declined. Lastly, we were asked to thank God for something He had done for us. This time, Josh wanted to pray first, boldly offering up, “Thank you so much, God, for letting me catch those frogs.” And with tears in my eyes at such innocent, beautiful childish gratefulness, I thanked God for the frogs too, and said a hearty “Amen.” After we had finished praying, and the pastor began speaking again, Josh whispered to me, “When I used to live at my other house, I prayed that God would let me catch a frog. Now He did.” And I told Josh that He had such a good, loving Father, that not only did He answer Josh’s prayer, He answered it x 10.

Sometimes it takes a child to teach us.

God so desires to give us good things. He so desires for us to pray to Him with child-like faith—believing He will hear us. I think He has probably has tears in His eyes when we adore Him as our doting Father, run to Him with our trivial concerns, and wait confidently for Him to answer.

And answer us He will.

In abundance.

Maybe even x 10.

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

Matthew 7:7-10

Like a Child

Faith strips the mask from the world and reveals God in everything.
It makes nothing impossible and renders meaningless such words
as anxiety, danger, and fear, so that the believer goes through life
calmly and peacefully, with profound joy--like a child, hand in hand with his or her mother.

Charles de Foucald

But I have stilled and quieted my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother,
like a weaned child is my soul within me.

Psalm 132:2

Freedom Fence

When my older kids were little and we lived in town, our home was situated just one house away from a busy street. On beautiful spring and summer days, and sometimes even on wintry ones, Luke, 4, and Tess, 2, would beg me to let them go outside to play. I loved to have them play in the backyard, but I also had to accomplish things inside the house. And since I didn't trust their preschool judgments regarding traffic, I rarely let them play outside unattended. Therefore, there was always the dilemma of them wanting to be outside longer then I wanted to watch them.

I knew a fence--a chain link fence with a childproof gate--would solve my problem. I also knew this solution would be a costly one. So, after one particularly pleasant evening, as my husband, Brent and I watched the children playing happily in the backyard, I broached the subject of "The Fence". Knowing that Brent made decisions according to logic, I laid out my proposal in a very systematic, non-emotional manner. And to my surprise, after some discussion about cost and sacrifice, my proposal was accepted! I was thrilled!

My friend, "The Fence", was installed within a matter of weeks. It was beautiful and shiny, and it wrapped around my entire long backyard. It made me smile just to look at it.

Now, on any day--sunny, rainy, windy, cold--Luke and Tess, and sometimes one-year- old Shay, could wander out to the screened porch, shimmy through the punched out screen in the bottom of the door, and make their way--unattended!--into the wide world of backyard wonder!

I didn't have to watch them every single minute! They had limits to their freedom and they were safe--maybe not from each other--but at least from the road. When they stayed within the confines of "The Fence", they were happy, I was happy, and no one had to fear danger or punishment. What a wonderful barrier!

Instead of curtailing their childish curiosity, "The Fence" actually gave them more freedom to do what they wanted...where they wanted...when they wanted---just as long as they stayed within in its bounds. The boundary of "The Fence" let them know exactly how far they could go in their explorations before they got in trouble. The boundary of "The Fence" gave them (and me) a sense of security and protection. The boundary of "The Fence" let them know that everything within its borders was "good" and OK for them. The boundary became their blessing because it fully explained their freedoms and kept them from dangerous situations. They never thought of the fence as bad or restrictive because they so enjoyed their increased freedom within it.

Isn't that what God does for us? He lays out the rules for us in the Bible. He tells us how far is too far. He shows us how to curtail our anger or our passion or our appetites with His power and His Word before they get us into trouble. He shows us how to stay within His will and under His authority. He tells us if we "go it on our own" the devil can "run us down" with his schemes.

God gives us boundaries because He loves us. He gives us boundaries so we can run free without getting hurt. And He gives us boundaries because He can bless us within them. Within His boundaries, we can enjoy security and safety.

Without these "fences", we act like foolish preschoolers and we run into the road of self destruction. We go too far because we don't know how far we can go.

These boundaries are set in place by love and sacrifice. It cost God His Son to give us His Spirit. Now that's an expensive fence!

So...next time the Word convicts you or you get a check in your spirit that says, "Don't go there", stop. Step back in. And give thanks for the "Fence" of Freedom.

"When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slave to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life."

Romans 6:20-22 (NIV)